Reflections from my phantom hamstrings

Dear Mandy,

Remember when you would train hard and push until you had nothing left to give but after a second thought you would think you still had some and so for the longest time you had the pattern of thinking that you’re not good enough? Your desperation fed me at every lift, push and pull. When you touch the back of your legs now and feel that empty feeling of not just the lack of hamstrings but lack of hard work, that’s what that pit in your stomach is telling you…  I’m whispering to you my need to grow and support you again. When you stop fatiguing after three jumps and you feel like you’re not going to break at the sight of a slightly bigger jump, you’ll know I’m coming back for you.

With love,
Your hamstrings

Dear beloved hamstrings,

Here are a few reasons but not excuses for my lack of love towards your growth. I believe by living so differently than we are used to the last few months, we can become even more compatible in the future.

I have been coasting in the Provence Alpes-Cote d’Azur. I learned a few things from these slower months where I’ve let myself go loose. This soft lifestyle has turned me akin to something like a marshmallow. The three reasons fall under rationality, French eating habits and using the breathe which will be expanded upon.


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